She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
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