if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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