You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Randomize
