The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
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