i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Randomize
