She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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