this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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