i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
Who died my cat blue again?
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
