you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize