I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
