i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
