You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
Randomize
