Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
apparently the secret to your success is patron
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Randomize
