Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
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