he shaved USA in his pubs
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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