I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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