moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Randomize
