ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Randomize
