just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
Randomize