I'm going to rape someone's good day.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
Randomize