Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Randomize