Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize