How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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