bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
