I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
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