i just had sex bonerless
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
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