Those balls look pretty dangerous.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
