I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize