I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
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