Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
