you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
I'm sitting next to this guy at the bar. I wrote him a little song in my head it goes "there is no fucking chance you're getting in my pants" gonna sing it to him after he buys me another drink.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize