Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
Randomize