I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
