i don't like sucking hair
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Randomize