wakey wakey hands off snakey
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
She swung at the pinata with crutches
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Randomize
