dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
I'm like, not good at living.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
