oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Randomize