She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
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