then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
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