Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
Randomize
