I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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