I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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