The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
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