Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Randomize
