summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
You're a waste of cheezeits
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Randomize
