That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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