...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Randomize
