Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
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