best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize