So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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