What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Randomize
