There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
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Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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